Finding Your True Self in Every Moment
Have you ever noticed how you can get completely lost in conversations? One moment you’re talking with someone, and the next moment you’re worried about how you sound, what they think of you, or whether you’re saying the right thing. This happens because we forget the most basic truth about ourselves – that we simply are.
What Does It Mean to Just “Be”?
Being before becoming means staying aware that you exist, right now, in this very moment. It’s not about who you might become or what you should be doing. It’s about recognizing the simple fact that you are alive and present.
Think about it this way: before you say “I am happy” or “I am tired,” there’s already an “I am” that exists. That basic awareness of your existence is what we’re talking about. It’s always there, like a quiet background hum, but we often forget to notice it.
The Problem with Getting Lost in Our Heads
When we talk to people, we sometimes get caught up in controlling everything. We worry about saying the wrong thing or coming across badly. This happens because we’re operating from fear rather than from our natural state of being.
“The whole system unwinds and relaxes when we know who we are by knowing that we are,” explains spiritual teacher Ram Dass. This simple awareness dissolves the knots of worry and control that keep us tense and disconnected.
When we’re afraid, we try to manage every word and reaction. But when we remember that we simply exist – no matter what happens – we can relax. We don’t need to control everything because our basic being is already complete and whole.
A Simple Practice to Stay Connected to Being
Here’s an easy way to practice staying aware that you exist:
The Eye Contact Exercise: Find someone to look at – a friend, family member, or even someone in a public place. Look them in the eyes while maintaining awareness that you exist. Don’t try to figure out what they’re thinking or how you appear to them. Just stay connected to the simple fact that you are here, right now.
You might feel uncomfortable at first. Old worries or thoughts might come up. That’s normal. The key is to keep coming back to the awareness that you exist, no matter what else is happening.
The Name Practice: While maintaining this awareness of being, say your name out loud. But don’t focus on your name – focus on the “I am” that comes before it. Your name is just sounds rolling off your tongue, but your being is the foundation underneath it all.
The Beautiful Result of This Practice
Something amazing happens when you stay connected to your basic existence during interactions. You stop trying so hard to control everything. Your natural intelligence can flow freely because there’s no scared, separate self getting in the way.
As it says in Ecclesiastes 3:1, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven.” When we’re grounded in being, we naturally know what to say and when to say it. We don’t have to force it.
The more you practice this, the stronger it becomes. It’s like building a muscle – the more you remember that you exist, the more automatic it becomes. Eventually, this awareness of being becomes so bright that it outshines all the worries and fears that used to distract you.
Why This Changes Everything
When you prioritize being over becoming, you choose happiness over control. You’d rather be at peace than be right. This shift allows your natural love and intelligence to shine through in every conversation and interaction.
The beautiful truth is that you don’t need to become anything special – you already are. Your basic existence is enough, complete, and perfect just as it is. From this foundation, everything else flows naturally.
Starting Your Practice Today
Begin with small moments throughout your day. While talking to a cashier, walking to your car, or sitting in a meeting, simply remember: “I am here. I exist.” Don’t add anything extra to it. Just rest in that simple awareness.
You’ll be surprised how quickly you forget to practice – and that’s perfectly okay! The moment you remember is the moment you can start again. Each time you return to this awareness, you’re strengthening your connection to what you truly are.
Your being is the light that illuminates everything else in your experience. The brighter this light becomes, the more clearly you’ll see that you’ve always been whole, complete, and free.
Quote
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” – Carl Jung
Summary Points
- Being comes before becoming — before we achieve, speak, or act, we already are. Awareness of this is the foundation of peace.
- Fear dissolves in awareness — when we rest in “I am,” fear and the need to control naturally unwind.
- Awareness is liberation — simply knowing that you exist, without adding labels or stories, frees you from ego’s tight grip.
- Practice is remembering — you will forget often, but returning to awareness again and again strengthens it.
- Connection deepens through being — when we stay rooted in awareness, our relationships become lighter, freer, and more authentic.
- Being outshines becoming — when you live from being, love and intelligence guide your actions more effortlessly.